I couldn't find it in me to pick up the phone and tell this Let's Talk thing that I can't go to this course/group therapy thing tonight, I'm not sure if I'm supposed to call to let them know or if I can choose not be there and they won't notice or what. I'm worrying they'll just assume I was too scared to go or something and not bother with me anymore.
Maybe I'll go down tomorrow to try and find their office or whatever and talk to them face to face depending on the weather and how I'm feeling.
Just feeling so damn useless, I hate how situations as simple as picking up a phone just seem like huge and horrid difficult situations to me and how everything I'm trying, in order to sort out or better understand what's going on with me, seems to fall flat on it's face and I'm back at square one again.
I kinda just wish I could stay in bed all day today.
Also linking this pic by a friend of mine on dA, because it speaks the truth:
Just replace the office with a supermarket and you have what I feel like with being creative over these last few years and especially this year. I used to be so full of ideas for pictures and stories, then I got that damn job and BOOM feels like every ounce of creative energy was just zapped from me.